thoughts

from bed, we’re not acting

Posted on by andrewsmeyer

when the torture of today’s truth is realized, recognized, and surrounded by sensible steps forward, we can march to principles based on a common cause and find a way out of this collection of clues troubling our thoughts as we stir in dark rooms

squeezing severed with reality eyelids trying to sleep for an hour, maybe more

then their voices crash in, rising and falling, bouncing and walking, screaming and mocking, crying and stalking

our calm that came when running hallways of blame

now lost

laying alone

my consciousness switches to my pounding-hammer parts responding to the sounds you use when trying to be seen

the sounds

echo

a final statement set with treacherous tones

i’m not alone

you come with me

when i lay at night trying to find peace

for all of us

inside these senses reflecting

impact

from a chair, almost there

Posted on by andrewsmeyer

i couldn’t comprehend the chants as the ground started to swell

twisted satire leading the way

a fantasy display to detail the tale of this five act play in a rented out band shell drifting towards the slow decline

draining the last drop

to please sadistic pleas

wading in the rising sea

feet finding a safe path leading, beaten

it’s lonely at the top

push out

push away

falling all around

wires touch between my hands

i’m in control

from a plane, the flight attendant didn’t know i knew her story

Posted on by andrewsmeyer

nervous smiles were quick to exchange between deranged thoughts she was taught to rearrange through black cat-eye glasses and red lipstick, luck is lost when she walks by

ask the love that was suppose to survive

vows vanished

she kept the candle

lit once

for all to see

before eternities sea rose and dampened the flame, a single wish never blown

just chances, set them free

unfortunately

she loved the pinch of handcuffs

i met her today, ironic-squints passed through scratched lenses as she pulled a yellow lifeless vest over sprayed straight hair and taught us to float

if we should fall from the air

what to pull, who’s responsible, face masks, make sure you can breath…

before you confront emergencies

her eyes fake scanned feigned-attention faces that won’t follow the plan

her plan?

she popped a mint and sat down

the captain has twine and a lighter

her hands are clean and free

landing safely

she wished us a good stay

there’s two ends to every candle

from bed, quick draw

Posted on by andrewsmeyer

i never saw it the same way

twisted, muted, the land of gray

it wasn’t as if i knew her name

while walking the lane

where soggy wallet spinsters play steel-faced, quickly turning away

it was my time to walk alone with gusty gutsy ‘i love you’ guarded tones flipping and flying from our demise, my mouth

i kept pushing the pace against street cars lined in parade positions

a child heart glistens with nothing left to give but dirty water flushing, asteroid signs

never respecting the unicorn kind that trounce around on casket clouds

while wearing a shroud of blisters and boils

you should have won

from bed, sleep won’t come so easy

Posted on by andrewsmeyer

clock click bang

click clock bang

these are the words they sang

silver shells blast through pain-hell halls we create while zombie emotions learn to tell the tales of our fails

heads and tails

loser at every flip

bang

through the head they rang

bang

well rehearsed responses

‘we’ll pull together. we’re -blank- strong’

wrong

that song

roots you assholes

roots of the cause

these bloody symptoms

pills keep popping pushing away pain

diseases keep spreading

i can’t feel it

i only respond

stop

i looked at those faces today

i do every day

eyes

sitting, searching, nodding

they know

they can’t count on us

if we’re not there

talk, share, define they’re grief!

they don’t ‘just know’

we have to pass this thing down

campfires and kitchen tables used to illuminate our faces, not rectangle spaces

they know

no ‘they’ don’t

open your fucking mouth

from a lot of places, i wish these shootings would stop

Posted on by andrewsmeyer

how do i get to my kids?

wading through hearts left on the floor

it’s february 14th, you know?

teachers gurgling blood

mentees can’t make out who it is, by shoes alone

jesus fucking christ how many god damn more

children?

unsafe in seats

tragedies like these

be better than us, more than this

i’m a teacher

i’m with your kids

everyday

these bullets

the ones we allow to fly

make you, me, us

complicit

we gun down their emotions and need for attachment firing at their self-esteem needing a screen to tell us how to make dinner, that our parenting skills are okay

not today

you sit and stay when you see someone gray

say something

don’t joke about their shades

i dare you

too bright?

tell them to come back tomorrow

bullshit agendas next is what we swallow from guns to homeschool religion,

WARNING SIGNS?

Teach warning signs?

Do we ever think to discuss the problems?

selfishly shuffling away from blame

i know his name

troubled youth?

contemplation of suicide waiting in a desk for class to start

their ‘friends’ will do it for them

human being human being

we are disrupting the measures that make a human being

shootings at our schools?

can you understand that shit?

children

yah, teach our kids to open their eyes to their friends mental health problems, cause teachers have toted that one around long enough, when in the hell are the paper pushers going to stop shifting in unaccountable social media chairs

monster’s stares

who cares?

that’s the question

who cares?

they are asking us

who cares?

will we do something?

who cares?

it’s your fault

who cares?

from bed, go back to then

Posted on by andrewsmeyer

“…a tree falling…”

i couldn’t hear the last part

creative cashing-in

beveled blades that transfer wealth

i crept beside her

listening to the steam rise from forest floors

casual benefits

blithering

shrugged silence

broken trials

treaties

denials

retreating

we couldn’t keep up

halted

still life

left listless in language-less hallways

advances

echoing dance steps stranded in anxieties alien shoes

technology

bring me back home

under her draped past

arms that welcomed

a few million

others came under her dress

around a breast

out of reach

couldn’t spare her breath

pass a test

one in four

chances

they watched you erect her

defilement

i’ll believe you when you say it happened

i can’t hear their words

if i’m not in the room

from bed, ready for it

Posted on by andrewsmeyer

reveal those parts that others relate to and relish in the reaction that we are all revolving around the same renegade revelations that connect our retail rate emotions simmering in caldrons of disjointed sustenance ensuring we are all fed before bed distanced from dread calculating new measures of what it takes to open our eyes when mornings draw open our shades

we know the new dawn will bring us to understanding the ticking of time created by a mime who acts out the sunshine spreading its wings to open mist fields of starlings feeding and catching wind

flocking in sequence

taking turns with no sense

what it means to be alone

we can imitate

climb out of fear fate

feel the feather’s beat in rhythms meant to join us once again to common goals.

from bed, regrets disregarded

Posted on by andrewsmeyer

Contemplating confused states of misunderstanding when i should keep my mouth closed and let you lead the way

it’s not easy

standing by

shuffling states of being in hopes of drawing the trump card we can all use to hit our target number of tricks

dialed in without knowing what one another wants

needs

the author of this confrontation bleeds

as we hop over her limp blue body denying deaths drumbeat. the dum dum sish boom bahs of our rhythmless foot steps marching to bodies of water waiting for our crownless souls to dip in and become a part of losing control

featherless flyers

filtering out the pieces of mystery to stay sane on a spinning orb of indecision and deception

i can’t claim i wasn’t there

you saw me

huddled in a corner

wishing i hadn’t stated my purpose

now you know

i couldn’t join you

even when i grabbed tight and kept you tethered to past triumphs that have become meaningless

i’ll let you go

if you promise to visit the stone remains that prove our time spent together

from bed, we’re there while they’re here

Posted on by andrewsmeyer

when did we stop watching fireflies fade during summer nights spent spinning in circles shrouded by stunned emotions holding tightly to the thoughts that we were alone in parks where patrons left hours before leaving us to wade in shallow water, splashing the day’s leftover innocence on one another’s goose bumped flesh cleansing the marks left from the quiet deaths their judgements marked while widened dreams danced off our lips sucking away every desire of a new day while we held the night tight drifting out of sight from the oglers need to be where we were meant to be tripping away from the pain deserted pathways overgrown from knowing it wasn’t the way.