gladly
i’ll step down
go ahead
climb up
not what you thought?
it’s yours now
responsibility and all
see, it’s not easy
i know the feeling
letting go
so, goodbye, your fate depends on a visitor
or stone
goodbye, sights are yours to decipher
alone
goodbye, careful what you wish for
candle blown
goodbye, i’m moving on
dismounting, grown
goodbye
goodbye
goodbye
tom petty sang the song
free fallin
i always identified with the vampires walking in the valley
i would’ve moved with them
until i discovered
daylight drops from the sky synchronizing singular beings with the whole
survival of the fittest
not might
it’s wrong
i fell into something
mostly an old song
humming along
we sit
bees swarm
trouble finds them
newspapers and backs of hands
getting up
wading through crowds
designer jeans worn by misfit teenagers
stretching and warranting a surprise
here comes the sun
milk and honey
blisters find fingers
searching for sustenance
blankets fall uneven
grass not mowed
nothing distracting us
we now lay alone
looking up
beautiful side of duality
potential disaster
as ashes fall, we cheer
could they imagine
this cunning freedom
we walk back
to homes undisturbed
deliver me from heavenly creatures who only do the bidding of their own kind, to protect the flight of wings wound with wire and feathers, mesh and flesh
preserving all they know
without looking out
candles burn
leading our way to shoe clad monsters clip-clop-clapping around
uncovering homes of the lost and unfound
exposing fault to find faith
sharing inadequacy, it wasn’t the seventh but the eighth
day, when we sang together
you, soaring above, nose high, self-righteous indignation, mirrors must not be hoisted to the sky, the atmosphere is two-ply, insulating insults, words we catch in the breeze
when you come down
to where we dwell
witness instead of speculate
heaven describes what’s above alone, not a status of gold perched on a throne
what do you call us when setting the table of difference?
other
bother
try
mother and brother
we’ll share spaces
find more pleasure
touching faces
grafted personalities with wind-blown hairdos did the desert dance in sand filled bedrooms while clutching arid histories against milk depleted breasts
hope crumbled as swirling dirt devils divided what happened
with
what was wished for
we can’t taste the innocence of a sour dairy kiss anymore, without wondering which farm you wandered away from
developing a future, progeny
will cease
birds will fly
dogs will bark
worms will weasel through holes, no longer visiting the sea
we came together, for destruction
brought together, so they could continue on
they want to save the snow leopards
selling lemonade
cars stop, smiles and exchanges occur, habitual customs, they walk away quietly dumping uncovered sugar contents in street gutters before careening suburban corners without a seatbelt
money fills the jar, to keep alive childhood rituals, symbols that innocence existence on street corners
in white neighborhoods
she wants to go to disneyland
selling water below one bedroom paranoia, people walk-by, needing sustenance, they acquiesce, money hits her palm, fear-threatened people make phone calls to police
for black children
i’m neither, them or they
i’ve been told i shouldn’t speak this way, given my experience
i can pretend i’ve been ostracized, falsely accused, driven away, left raising money for myself, not for far away fur creatures
disneyland, it’s better than lunch
fortune finds us all, believing it’s monetary, the start of our fall
relatable situations, empathy
we’re not as far apart as any of us want
we’re all selling something on street corners, in backseat of uber lyfts, alone in the car-pool lane
our desire to connect without commitment, ensures we all know our place
heaving
gasping for breathe while every leaf-raked emotion blows around my head again, kicked up, stirred, perfect-compartment piles shuffled through, kicked to the wind by your decision to enter again
through the front door
a home purposefully redecorated, walls torn down, your face not found, closets cleaned, memories unforgiven, now, NOW, you walk through the front yard on an autumn afternoon seeking refuge whilst destroying order
did you see the sidewalk?
what was in front of you?
that’s what led to tight lipped moments together
your inability to understand the means
an end
which means
you have no understanding of what this means, implications, outcomes, your finality, it’s in sight
again
you need to be told twice
don’t think
it’s alright
i’ll use a blower next time, and burn the remnants of early spring’s green hope
it’s real
that sensation that starts at the fingers of a forgotten friend and finds its way through you, holding hands wishing the sway would turn to a grasp and lead to rolling in freshly watered grass, overcoming discomfort in the name of passion, spontaneity
finding buttons and zippers to undo and divide, blissfully panting, newfound pride found in rhythmic pulses leading to shouts of freedom, letting go of every inhibition, primal yelps breaking neighborhood night silence in a park down the street from where our parents lived
and once loved
they had fake smiles and handshakes, birthday parties and shared steaks sizzling on wedding present grills pouring friday night puffs of community into styrofoam streets
neighbor coveted neighbor coveted neighbor, swapping stares as sundresses flipped up while planting perennials along front lawn borders, a tasteful fence
fears were multiplied when we started to subdivide and ran away from what made us great
what’s real?
the feel of coming back to plastic childhood haunted backyards, and parading in twenty year old libido with the next door pigtails you always wanted
i packed the information deep in the crease of a car seat waiting for him to return from his midnight run to the south-side of town where whispers were captured and drowned in the effervescent moon glow
building intensity until climax and i should change my shorts before i return unless you can convince them the squirm in my heels and kicks of my legs are due to an innocent grabbing of my sinister stick plucked and peeled from the family tree i fell out of two weeks before the beginning of jail night stays
i commit the crime, and they saw it that way, wishing wicked thoughts would welcome whatever it is you drink before toxic conversations turn to fists breaking flesh and “i hate you’s” that are healed by mornings aching eyes, rolling over and smelling thighs until you realize it’s the thought of disappointment you dispose of in accidental dumpster fires where once and again, forever, and never will my rod bend when i capture a glimpse of your stagnant water wishing it had taken a left instead of a right down the middle, play it safe bullshit life without a fight to call me to help during hellfire deliveries, packages banged and rearranged wondering which doorstep you live behind
i knew waiting for you would spin into this
the information is there
deep in your seat
take a look
sincerity in your glow
not a rabbit
or a man
future, righteousness
glowing rock wonder, a time keeper depended upon by women and travelers
you’re the balance necessary for enlightenment, hanging and dressed in contentment’s promise
you go unnoticed, some nights
hidden behind pollution clouds, taken for granted
and, some nights, we don’t fight, we stare, wondering what the other is thinking, mesmerized by your consistent arrival, the reassurance that we can find our way
home
when sunlight sleeps
guiding our dreams, possibilities, plans to execute
while you watch without agenda, fixed, in our night sky
i’m glad i was taught
to look up
my morning stream 