you stuck the wooden mallet down my throat and began churning out helpless emotions i stuffed deep years ago to dispel the myth that i am predetermined to your sink-disposal life they threw everything into before you ran away
i’m ok
it made me gag a little
i can taste the past
visions will never last
i bleached my eyeballs
knowing i had to keep moving
my sentences full of your pronouns
i forgot how to say her name
digesting symbols of those who came before the blame
it was them
jesus and the gang
names, like animal emotions
only for us
humans
i gurgled visions of father figure fuck over from a forged outcome past and spat hard on rocks as i kept walking
you’re behind me
motionless
the handle hangs out of your bludgeoned head
eyes resting
red
unfed
dead