poet

from a stump, the rocks are piled high

Posted on by andrewsmeyer

capture the captains and make sure they can’t escape

where are they anyway?

the captains

oh, you thought there was only one who looked over what’s not captured by the sun

surprises left by ancient sign stealers who whisked away their peoples last complaints and walked on with a single saint

yet a sinner to each one helps balance this act

the third of five

we’ve risen now we rise in climatic predictability to gain invincibility and walk right through the power you create when there is nothing left to equate my fate left on a pile of sticks next to his burning bush

the sticks survived

while you contrived a fable to explain all the bread on your table as most are unable to find a stable

to sleep in

wickedness we’re steeped in

dreams we’re seeked in

the din

of sin

greets me again

i was looking for them

those captains

i’m not sure they escaped

i just wasn’t sure where to find them

from bed, a letter

Posted on by andrewsmeyer

Hi –

Thank you to all followers and those who stop-by to check out “my morning stream”. If you haven’t read the “about” tab, please do, it shares the process and project behind this blog.

In total, I’ll be looking at two years of streaming, editing, sharing, worrying, forgetting, fretting in self-conscious fits, and otherwise being a writer who feels as though they have something to share.

Delayed gratification, wrapping my head around insecurity, and understanding process are the underlying personal challenges i expose while undertaking this endeavor.

Themes that come out of my writing? Those are many and varying.

I rushed around a lot, still do some, though I’m coming to terms with my skin and abilities of what I am and who I share – what we have is one another. Not always peaceful, not always at war, and sometimes just being; yet together as we push and pull to create something greater than what came before.

By profession, and otherwise, i’m a teacher. i believe in the pursuit of being uncomfortable, taking risks, and sharing what we have to offer to continue sewing the infinite thread that passes through the tapestry of human history, as to not lose the fundamental pieces of who we are as beings.

Who are we?

People who desire love and community, people who are destined to experience loss and humility. One beat with billions of faces finding ways to contemplate and share experiences that bind us.

Thank you, again, for your support. Some days I’m embarrassed by what I publish, others proud, and sometimes I feel like I don’t know the person who wrote the words you see.

Surprise and mystery, of ourselves and one another, are reason enough to rise in the morning.

I look forward to conversation and visiting the worlds you create.

Thank you,

Andy

from a stool, morning is becoming night

Posted on by andrewsmeyer

i slumped

when i saw the satisfaction you took in skipping ahead of the sunrise

a surprise

it was ours

the glow

coming up, casting shadows with caution while carefully creating cascading columns, shafts of light to shelter the catatonic owls who squint themselves to sleep

you didn’t want to be there

alone and unaware of the depth my breath would have to travel in an effort to calm my loss

the losing of someone who celebrated our awakening

you see,

i need you

and it’s a lie they feed you that we’re suppose to find this thing by ourselves

that somehow strength is found in stretching our arms and eyes without you to spy so i can surpass the butterflies that crawl and flutter through bellyaching nights to an understanding of this thing

this life

this temptation to answer the question we’re born with

the exercise of pushing limits in search of hoping, accidentally, without hurting

we can find the truth

come back

from bed, clouds are clearing

Posted on by andrewsmeyer

catapult yourself over the wall

now duck down

close your eyes

caution will slip away

look up

the peak is covered in displays of light-hearted remorse drifting by as another scene unfolds

did we forget our lines

i hope so

let’s improvise interactions that have fallen to rehearsed reactions captured by a narrator who taunts us with mundane fractions of our day lost in painfully predictable and particular fashion causing greater factions in the mental boxes we open and close with emotional roles defined by effect and cause poles that leave us both

lonely

gasping for breath

i could do anything

i can

i can stand where i once sat and forget what i once thought while dancing where my feet grew firmly to the floor

we have chances to break free once more through a sliver in the door

a sliver in my pore, stuck painfully deep no tweezers long reach can free me from carrying this piece of trying

we must

breach the gates where chain links now lock us away

push

now, push

push

stop

locks need to be opened not forced to disclose the truth of our course that lives on this side of the wall

open your eyes

we’re there

from the same fold out bed, heading home

Posted on by andrewsmeyer

step inside

where a swirling mass of geniuses once resided

where conversations began and our hearts continued

blink

now we’re trained by whistles in times of dismissal, we forgot to notice the sun was setting hours earlier as buildings got taller and bridges crumbled

there’s no way out

hurried remarks cast aspersions on the page where once consideration had a role to play we belly up and hit send threatened to upend the way we look at another weekend

where’s pollyanna when you need her

my glasses are frosty and fogged if she could take the wheel and begin to peel the reform of repeal replace my meal reseal the deal of this slimy feel to get a meal without the ordeal of carry and conceal

i know what’s in your pocket and i’m never happy to see you

let’s refine this conversation to include condensation that forms in layers above us and brings down life

Bob would ask if you could deny it*

try to untie it

the riddle

i’m waiting for the fiddle while buildings spontaneously combust and ashes fly filling coffins with dust

no one is there to carry them

just piles of us

on top of us

on top of more us

finally getting along in the breeze

*Bob Dylan song “Visions of Johanna” reference

from a fold out bed, loud breathing

Posted on by andrewsmeyer

your lies kept us together

disorganized thoughts ordered into chaos as i wonder, while the answer waits

i’ve basked in synonymous questions for a dense decade decorated in more dancing than dread

but

they keep coming up

the questions

a mark

i emphasize key words hoping to bend your ears into your heart for a reality to create a fresh start

your bafflement and approach are beyond reproach as a new spin catches up to my doubt within this empire of frustration that you love

minute to minute

facts left through the back door, carrying the means in a worn out brief case

i see an end

it’s because of the means and they don’t justify a thing

relationships don’t have a blue finish line ribbon to rip

nothing to cross

just the one over my shoulder

and i don’t believe it’s there

i do know what’s in that box stored deep in the recess of her minds mind minding your business which is carrying suitcases with starched men who drink double scotches and order them like every asshole orders a double scotch

on the rocks

i’m getting lost as you’re forgetting you tossed two mop heads and loyalty to a cost benefit that’s your analysis

did you win?

i can’t say it was anything more than a tie as this goodbye suffers in with a favorite lie

the one we told when i played with the fold of white hand sweat paper

i didn’t need to look

i remembered and rehearsed those words

not needing to bow, it wasn’t a show

maybe i’m tethered to a web of my past masking itself in the way you bask in everyone’s sunlight while guiding relationships by moonlight

maybe it’s your patience that keeps us together

maybe

from a fold out bed, be careful of pronouns

Posted on by andrewsmeyer

i zipped it shut and walked away

innocence trapped in a bag with my initials on it, an ode to a forgotten time when gifts were working to define how i’d view the world

it sits on the top shelf in my closet now

holding letters to mysterious creatures and old candy bar wrappers

i peak inside from time to time

inspiration for a way home

stuck inside, curiosities roam from peak to valley in midnight walks around a room built for two, or three, maybe four. there are enough doors, pick one you want to exit through

or, we could take them all off in fits of honesty and clear out the pretension that sits with knowing we’re somewhere they can’t be

they’ll always run free

because they get to treat the sounds that clatter from our room as little more than the raising of little ones to do our bidding when the mice shriek down the stairs they’ll be crushed by side-eyed stares and who cares if one of you light the flare it’ll only alert hyper-egos and selfish sun soaked children to look away while their loved ones are feasted on and carried to a place of infinite corners and steam shop loaners wandering into one another wondering if there is a way to grab that bag out of your closet

unzip it

and let the dreams of children fly through fanciful forgotten scenes of innocence

those are my initials though

it’s mine

that’s what they were trying to tell me

close that thing

from bed, well timed

Posted on by andrewsmeyer

like you

i navigated ancestral waters to an opening in the sky, splatters of holy water were left covering her thighs

careening into valleys

sliding down alleys

puddling

rippling from the vibrations of my crossing chasm screams that came crashing out of lungs learning to leave

an understated goodbye

a piece of you and him

alone now

i leave messes for you to remember

it was your decision

a collision kept from love

though that doesn’t define what platforms i design to account for mountains swallowing my pride in moments when i catch a glimpse of your puckered face twisted from grace grabbing and gobbling the giant goblins gift as i grant permission to press on in this plane

plain to see what was given from you to me

this dimpled chin, blemished skin, and a sin to thin out the crowd

stop and listen

to the others joining us here

crawling out of a home where we’ll all return

they hold the answer