from a porch, snapshots after dawn

dial your phone

press the numbers, not my face

full force intention making things worse as we work to walk through days in different time zones with lovers who move sheets but can’t stir the sour parts of my soul that you sucked on waiting for me to run dry

so your sweet touch could cover up all the indecision that led me to nightmare scenarios

getting in my own way

killing friendships with precision

leading you on with the curious-notion clouds that cover up a character i become to reflect everyone i bumped into

becoming what they need

i walk away

followed by a trail of blood left from my side leaking indelible marks on sad-cracked sidewalks

reminding me

that someday

if i choose

i can find my way

home

to an armchair

where

i’ll wait for your call

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