“And he will raise you up” was the start of a song from a place i don’t visit anymore

it became more of a store and some misgivings are hard to ignore when they strip away what could have been more all wrapped up in passed hats and lore. motionless beings now left on the floor clambering for the next door that they can walk through and find

another empty room

for what?

but that’s not what this is about

as i sit with my doubt

can’t even feel my fear fast enough to muster a shout as i know how to jump back from the field to the path a whisked away summer day when that wasn’t the problem

i keep pointing out what isn’t and need to start well, with what i need 

and that’s a positive statement a motion to show that this isn’t it now. it’s not my final curtsy and bow i’m not giving in today even as i look at you stammered lip, faced drench i stay emotionless using tools that someone left me and now i lay having to realize the long game 

the distant result 

that won’t come if i die today 

and then what

those eagle wings were lies and i’m left in the stench on this bench realizing he doesn’t have arms.